I'm writing this blog at the wee hour of 2 am, which should give some indication that I'm having a sleepless night. Let's just say the last couple weeks have not been stress free. Exactly two weeks ago, I/we learned that my husband would be "parting ways" with his company of almost 9 years. Well, isn't this a convenient time to be jobless? Yeah, not so much.
For the first time in a really long time, we've found ourselves wondering where our next source of income will come from. Ask me what my least favorite topics of conversation while barely 1/3 of the way through a pregnancy are. Oh, thanks for asking! They are....drumroll please....
1) Claiming Unemployment
2) Obtaining COBRA healthcare coverage
3) Researching Employee Rights & Negotiating Severance Packages
Some real doozies eh? I am really trying to be the good wife, but am beginning to ask myself how supportive and agreeable I can truly be during such a situation... while also trying not to pull every last hair on my head out. There have been some differences of opinion regarding this unexpected situation from all parties involved, and it's only natural that it would be stressful, not only on my hubby, but also on us as a couple and soon to be family.
Needless to say, I've gone into "doing anything and everything I can to help" mode. Part of that has meant back to work for me, substitute teaching every chance I can get. At the rate I'm going, I'm making about 1/10 of what my husband was making, so my subbing obviously won't get us far. However, any little bit helps, and even if it only covers groceries, it's something.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not crying a river over here, and we don't need sympathy. One of the good things about being poor in your youngers years is that you know how to make anything work. We'll make it through, because that's what we've always done, without asking for anyone's help. Hubby is interviewing right and left with, truth be told, more reputable and well-known companies with much better benefits than the employer he's leaving. Did I mention how proud I am of him? On top of it all, he's smack dab in the middle of earning his MBA as well. I happened to marry one of the most driven, and inspiring, and successful people on the planet, and it's only a matter of time before the right offers come his way.
Plus, I know God has something way bigger and better in store for us. I truly believe with my WHOLE ENTIRE HEART that while this unexpected news seems really inconvenient timing wise, it will actually end up being a huge blessing in the long run. Sure, right now it sucks. I don't think anyone breaks ties with an employer of that long without feeling like they've lost that loving feeling. And, if I'm being honest, we're both a bit f'ing scared about the future. However, my willingness to just MOVE ON far outweighs any fear I have about where our next meal comes from.
I tend to believe that in order for a new door to open, the first one has to fully close sometimes. I think it's safe to say I am ready for this door to be closed, even if it means walking away with less than what would make us comfortable. Sometimes, there is simply no pricetag that can make up for time and energy spent on battling with people. And of course, just when I was searching for a message that would help guide us through this trying time, leave it to Joel Osteen to deliver, as always.
My favorite line, "You can be pitiful or you can be powerful, but you cannot be both!" If you feel like something unfair has happened to you; Like it's been hard to move on or that bitterness over a situation is beginning to take over, watch this message "Get Over It." I bet you'll gain a difference perspective. Love, love, LOVE this message.
So enough about that. Thanks to those of you who have emailed asking what part of earth I dropped off of. I've just been busy and exhausted. It means a great deal that you guys care, so THANK YOU for emailing and asking for updates!
In other unexpected news, Texas has the craziest weather I've ever experienced. It's gone from sunny 70's to icy conditions and back and forth more than once over the past couple weeks, in the matter of literally 24 hours. Totally nuts! Take a look at this....
And now for the GOOD NEWS, that will easily trump any and all unexpected news. In the words of our perinatologist, "Baby looks perfect." We had our NT Scan yesterday @ 11w3d. This is where they take measurements to determine certain chromosomal risk factors caused by trisomies, and they can also assess risk for some other things like certain heart conditions. Nuchal fold measurement should be less than 3, and ours was less than 1. This is fantastic! Nasal bone should be fully intact and of certain size, and both u/s tech and MFM commented how all body parts were formed perfectly.
We were given a 0.33% chance (very low) of any chromosomal abnormalities based on this scan alone, meaning that it's about 99.67% that everything is perfectly normal. There is some additional bloodwork that is typically done along with the NT scan, which might further reduce our risk assessment. However, because we had a vanishing twin, this would make the blood result inconclusive, so we're simply not doing it. We're also choosing not to do an amnio, CVS, or any other tests which pose any risk to baby, even if only 1-2% risk of harm.
They viewed the baby from many angles and pointed out two legs, two arms, five fingers on the hand showing, and even individual ribs. He/she is starting to look like a real live human being at this point, so I'll share, even though a pic taken of an u/s pic is not the best quality.
Is it just me, or does that little white spot on the side of the head look like an ear? I think it might be. Lord help me, I'm turning into one of those women who thinks a fuzzy, grainy, black and white pic of their child's body parts is already cute. Baby A is still measuring ahead by one day and heartbeat is strong @167 bpm. This Friday makes 12 weeks. Two more weeks until we officially enter the 2nd trimester.
We're just so incredibly grateful beyond words that we at least have this baby to look forward to right now. All of life's problems just pale in comparison to the prospect of this beautiful healthy child that is on his/her way. A tornado could blow our entire house away today, and I seriously think I'd be fine, as long as this baby is fine and I have my amazing hubby by my side.
OMG, your baby bean looks sooooooo cute!!!!!! eeek! Yay for "perfectness!"...
ReplyDeleteSorry about the job, we have found ourselves in a similar position due to work issues, and it sucks, sucks sucks!!
many prayers things even out soon!!
I am thrilled for you! You guys have exactly what matters and your priorities are in order. We just went through the exact same situation last year as far as the job goes. My husband was laid off the month after we bought our home, his company was negligent & unethical (they are based in Dallas, wonder if it's the same company- :) ) and I was unemployed. We just battened down the hatches & made due, because we too had what mattered. Each other. XOXO thinking about you.
ReplyDeleteThat is great news about a healthy little baby! As for the other situation, I'm sorry... it sucks. But it definitely sounds like you're taking it in stride and that better things are coming your way. In a year you'll be saying, "Just think, if X hadn't happened, then we'd never have Y..." (and in this scenario, Y is a better, more fulfilling job, of course). Congrats again on the great ultrasound!
ReplyDeleteI've been wondering where you were and what you were up to... I'm so sorry about your husband's job! That just sucks! Believing with you that something better is just around the corner!
ReplyDeleteSo glad baby A is doing so well! What a huge sigh of relief that the NT scan went perfectly! Yay! Excited for you Emily!!!
Awwwww! What a beautiful baby!! So happy for you :). Prayers for your husband's work situation, I know how stressful that can be. XOXO
ReplyDeleteRob lost his job in June of last year after 11 years of employment while we were cycling. I was scared to tears of what the future would hold for us - I can say that 6 months later Rob now has employment with a company that adores him and that he is happy at. It took a long while for everything to fall back into place- but it did. I'll be praying for you guys!
ReplyDeleteYay I am so excited to hear from you! I am even more excited to hear that your beautiful baby is doing great, God is so good!! I'm sorry to hear about the job loss but I believe with you that something much better is on the way :)
ReplyDeleteI am believing with you that God has GREAT and AMAZING things in store for you! YAY that Baby A looks so beautiful! hugs!!
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Good to hear from you! I'm sorry to hear about your husband's job; that sucks. I remember being newlywed and so poor and discouraged, but my husband always reminded me that we were learning to be frugal, and if we ever experienced a job loss or tough financial situation in the future, we knew we could handle it. Good to hear you can draw on that as well. Baby A looks great!
ReplyDeleteGreat news!! And great attitude about the bad stuff too! :)
ReplyDeleteYou have such a good attitude and seem so supportive of your husband! Try and stay stress free, things happen for a reason! Sending lots of good vibes your way!
ReplyDeleteCongrats on a great scan!!
ReplyDeleteCobra can be a lifesaver but it is very expensive. I would encourage you to look into your options through the affordable care act/marketplace. For most people (especially those who don't smoke) the insurance options there will be cheaper than cobra. And you will just drop it when he gets coverage through a new job!
This is great advice and something we've definitely considered. Thanks Kimberly!
DeleteI am really sorry about DH's job. I know one drawback of the job was how often he was gone and now he might find an equally good or better job in town that allows him to be home more, which will be great when the baby comes. I do know it's stressful not knowing how it's all going to land. I'm keeping you guys in my thoughts during this time. However, I am so happy things are going so well with the pregnancy. So happy the baby is sticky and healthy!!
ReplyDeleteHi pretty baby!!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry about the other news and will be praying for you..
I think this sweet baby is just adorable! So glad to get an update and great to hear the scans went so well. Thank you Jesus!
ReplyDeleteTrusting the Lord will provide for you and your family. He always does! Keep us updated on your husbands search. Glad you have each other during all the ups and downs! Love you girl!
That is a beautiful picture of your baby! Could they tell if it was a boy or a girl? Too early for that?
ReplyDeleteThanks Kharini! It's still too early for gender. Heck, I'm still trying to figure out how they can even see the stuff they did point out, like the ribs and fingers. I will take their word for it!
DeleteYou are like me--I firmly believe that God never closes a door without opening a window, and that often times what seem like catastrophies are really blessings in disguise--no doubt your husband is meant to move on to greener pastures to the benefit of your entire family. But, change is scary--not knowing is not fun, and it will test you in so many ways. You'll "ace" this test though. And congrats on Baby A :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry to hear about your husband's job, but I am confident something better is coming your way. I'm so so glad you did okay driving on that ice! Stay safe! It sounds like your baby is pretty much perfect, so that is the best news ever :)
ReplyDeleteI absolutely LOVE the fact that baby looks perfect!!!
ReplyDeleteYou have such an amazing attitude, Emily! I love the pic of baby too, s/he looks absolutely perfect! I hate to hear that about your husband's job, but it's so encouraging that this could be better for you guys in the long run. Hopefully everything works out quickly and you get to see your baby again VERY soon :)
ReplyDeleteYay praises and Glory to God on all fronts. Even where un surety sits with your husband employment I know God has big things up his sleeve. I prayed for you and I can't wait to hear how this all turns around. PS I know exactly about being poor when younger and learning how to budget and do what was needed to keep our heads above water. God has been so good to us all.
ReplyDeleteI am happy and sad for this post. Giddy, overjoyed, to the point of backflips (well, if I could) kinda excited that Baby A is thriving!! I'm also sorry about the added stress regarding hubby's job. Sounds like he's going to bounce back better than ever, but completely understand how the "not knowing" kinda really throw you into a tailspin. You have such a great attitude and I know will handle this like a champ, as you've done everything thrown your way. xoxo
ReplyDeleteI love your good news! I am so happy to hear that all is going very well with Baby A! I do not love your unexpected news, and I'm sorry for all the stress that brings. You have such a positive attitude, and your husband sounds like he is a wonderful guy and hard worker, and I will be praying that he finds something better very soon. In the meantime, if you're interested in online work that you can do from home for a few bucks, feel free to email me at farra712atgmaildotcom. I can tell you about what I do, and it's pretty easy and doesn't involve any shady stuff. Just rating search results for search engines. :)
ReplyDeleteLOVE the ultrasound. So sorry to hear about the stress of your hubbies job. I think you have the exact right attitude- although it's not easy to just trust all the time that everything will be ok I think he will end up in an even better position and you guys will be so grateful for this twist, no matter how stressful, at some point. Hugs and YAY for a beautiful, perfect ultrasound. It absolutely brings tears of joy to my eyes to see this Emily!
ReplyDeleteHated to hear about the additional stress regarding your hubbys job. But he sounds very marketable so hopefully in the end...it will be for the best. So happy for your sweet baby developing so perfectly!!!!
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